Balancing Act: Six very different children out in public!

I dread going out with my children. Firstly, my back doesn’t like it when I stand, or work out, or walk, or kneel, or sit, or walk, or work out, or stand, or kneel, or sit… I’m sure you get the drift. 🙃 So, driving to our destination and actually getting out and walking, drain me before I even do it. I have to get home and lie down.

Then wrangling six children with different needs and personalities is not exactly enjoyable or easy for me. The big ones are fine and a help unless it’s hot then it’s grumble-fest. The last four…🤣They’re an adventure.

I’ll write more about each ones’ specific neurodevelopmental challenges and needs in password protected posts which you can request by emailing me T h a n d I w e n @ g m a I l . C o m but suffice to say, each diagnosis affects each child differently.

So we have one ADHD child with low registration who needs way more stimulation than the rest, in order to ‘feel normal.’ (Again, very basic layman’s term) We have the two young autistics. One of whom has multiple other diagnoses -this being our boy from my previous who’s now six years old, loves to go out. Loves to see things-so he says. BUT his body language and his words scream, “No! No! Help! I do not like these living, breathing, MOVING animals!” He’s fine at the museum, but go to a farmyard or bird park and it’s a whole different story. He’s scared. They scare him. So he walks as fast and as far away from them despite the ones yesterday not even coming close to him..and being behind wire!

My other autistic is a very energetic sensory seeker. Will share more when I do my password protected post on her diagnosis. That one will glance at an animal if you can get it to be noticed -not looking at what is being pointed at is one of the things that led me to the diagnosis. Literally glance for a second just enough for you to know she’s seen it, then off they are, running. That little one’s happiest when in constsnr motion. So, who has time to slow down and enjoy the animals when you’re chasing an anxious six year old and a runaway?

I miss out on my others’ experiences and thoughts. I miss out on the two year old being super excited about the snakes and talking with her as I race after her siblings. I miss the. “Brown snake! Black snake! Look at the eyes! Ooh, tongue! And ANOTHER snake!”

But I get hugs from the anxious one, thanking me for taking him to ‘the scary place.’😁 I get to enjoy seeing my runner running where there’s space instead of in our living room where she’s liable to trip on things she herself dropped. I get to laugh (internally) at the six year old autistic asking why we’re looking at other animals when we’re at a place called Giraffe House and therefore should ONLY go look at the giraffes.

I dread going out with my children. My body feels battered when I return and when I’m pain and pretending to be ok, it feels as if I’m assaulted by the different voices and their different challenges. But I never regret going. Ok, maybe once I did. But that’s because the ducks were free and followed us around which was too much for my six year old. I wished I had a clone who could sit in the car with him while I watched over my fearless runner who sticks her finger where it shouldn’t be. Plus, my low registration child gotten bitten by a rabbit she was feeding on that trip. The pain didn’t phase her. But she was kinda concerned by the amount of blood pouring out her finger! The repeat hospital appointments were fun for HER. Not for this mom’s heart! So yes, I regretted THAT trip.

But this most recent one before I go under the knife on Wednesday and am not allowed to even take a walk for three weeks minimum, was good. No regrets! (Under the knife IF my Covid test is negative. I had Covid in December and four weeks later still tested positive so had to postpone surgery. First ever positive pre-op test so I was really shocked and dismayed and am now paranoid about tomorrow’s one) This trip was perfect.

I got to hear my minimally speaking autistic notice one giraffe eating and heard her exclaim, “Nyum, nyum, nyum. Giraffe!” Hearing her speaking voice (She sings a LOT!) is so rare. I treasure those moments. Sharing an experience with her is a pleasure.

More importantly, THEY are happy getting out of their homeschool basement.

Just kidding! We don’t HAVE a basement 😉

But people seem to think homeschooling means deprivation of all human contact, no time spent outside the home, and deprivation of all sensory experience.🤦🏾‍♀️

It was a good trip.

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