Where’s the Post Office Guy?

First time getting pre-op results so quickly. Came in 11 hours. TIRED of dem nasal swabs though! Let this be IT!😩

Some years ago, way before the twins were even conceived, we visited the post office to go collect a parcel of clothing. There was a new White worker there, maybe in his late twenties or early thirties. He was extremely HAPPY. He immediately reminded me of my son because of his inability to control his volume while having an interesting way of speaking-his tone was… I assumed he was autistic.

I loved him! I’ve always had a special place in my heart for adults others might not ‘get.’ And get him, you might not! 😅He stated extremely loudly like he’s announcing he winner at an auction, “You must pay two thousand and ninety six rand. That’s two zero nine six!” It was CRAZY! Everybody was looking at us, we were shy because that’s a LARGE amount of money and besides his volume, that amount definitely drew their attention.., But it was FUNNY! Then when he scrawled illegibly on the form, for me it was confirmed that he was definitely special! He was there again another time, then we never saw him again.

That still makes me sad today. Though I know that’s silly. Maybe they DIDN’T fire him like I assume. Maybe he quit. I hope so. And if he was fired, I hope they had done everything they could to help him with whatever his weakness was. Or tried to get around it. I hope they did all they could for him.

This to introduce my sweet son’s progress. I wish I had his past colouring in pages. He would just scribble across everything in one colour. Just scribble fast, filling the entire page with only one colour… Now, considering he didn’t like to color in at all in the beginning, I was talking it slow. “At least he’s doing it! His weak muscles are getting in some much needed work, I’ll wait to teach him about not coloring in the entire page.” Till last week. Last week all his dad had to do was to praise his sister for staying in the lines and being careful, and yesterday..yesterday he used many different colors, stayed in the lines, he did so well that we assumed it was his sister’s work!😂(I print Bible story or nature lesson related pages for them to colour in during nap time so we adults aren’t there.) It’s only when our teen daughter, Eliora came with great glee, to show us that we found out it was his art! We were so impressed with him!

Friday, I’d already been impressed with him. He “can’t” write (yet.) Tried teaching him just to write M for his name Micaiah and he couldn’t. He always gets sad about his inability to writen. It was a combination of knowing how to form letters, and then moving his hand correctly… He knows the letters, but… So I am doing pre-school pre-writing tracing work with him to make him feel accomplished and start building the skills from scratch. (He’s doing well! Staying on the dots.)

So there he was Friday, watching me go through a spelling lesson with his sister. I decided to just test him. Just for ‘fun’ really. But he did it! He may not be able to WRITE it, but he can certainly form the words! He just needed the right tools for his needs!

Even his seven year old sister, Amarissa, was blown away! She had no clue what his little brain was hiding. This is a little boy who tells us, “Before, I’m going outside.” But has no clue why he’s using the word ‘before’ and cannot understand when we try tell him what it means. YOU try define the word to a child with global developmental delay and other issues. So it’s weird or shocking when his brain does work in an unexpected way that makes sense! I’ll definitely be using his typing skills and improving on them!

Then there’s my youngest angel! Firstly, I love being a mother. I love watching little ones develop and grow and learn new skills. Let’s talk about Twin A first, actually. Oreneile. (That’s a name referring to how God ‘gave’ her to us.) She’s sassy and confident and knows what she wants.

And we are apparently her loyal subjects.

She’ll tell us, “Mommy’s going to get me milk.” I am!?? Then when I bring it, she sweetly says thank you, and a very hurried but smiley, “Bye mommy” to chase me out while she chats with her big sister! The rudeness! Or I’ll sit with her on my lap, and read to her and as soon as her big sister enters the room, she suddenly closes the book, “All done! Bye book. Thank you, Mommy’” while jumping off my lap with a quickness! So… There I was, thinking we were bonding while she was just biding her time waiting for her sister! I love it! I need that. It’s important for her to not ‘need’ me given in going to be out of commission yet again post surgery this Tuesday.

Yes, I’m scared! It’s one thing being told by two surgeons , “You have no abdominal muscles. It’s lax, stretched, soft tissue…” and another to actually fix it! I asked the surgeon what he plans to do. “I’m going to fold your muscles in, then sew a large sheet of mesh onto them. You’ll be very uncomfortable…”

She’s playful, polite, gives us new full sentences every day and fills our lives with joy.

Last week, I took the children for a drive.

Twin B, Oreratile, was a hoot. (Oreratile refers to how God had ‘loved us.’) Usually she complains after a while, or sings loudly. But when we drove past Bayside mall and she saw the word Checkers (it’s one of the big supermarket chains in South Africa) she shouted, “a,b, c, d, e, f, g!” It was so sudden! We loved it!

Yesterday was even sweeter! Their dad drove them, and when she saw Checkers, she shouted “C!” (My girl is LOUD! Yes, I know that’s typical of lots of autistic angels!😊) When she Fisherman’s Lane, “F!” When she saw McDonald’s, she yelled, “M!” And not only that, she yelled out numbers she saw on car license plates! I’ve never heard her say numbers out of the blue. She does say the letters on our hoodies.

The children came back (Usually on Saturdays their dad takes them for a drive so I get a ‘break’ from being mommy) extremely excited! And their dad too! Everyone was so impressed with her!

I love these moments. I need these moments of grace. Things are not great. My body is in a war. I even temporarily lost my mind yesterday. Husband came into the room and I’d thrown off all my clothes and was almost crying. I felt wrong in my skin and my clothes felt like they were restricting me. My waistbands really irritate my incision that runs from the side of my torso, round to the front and all the way to the other side. It’s so SENSITIVE, sore as the day goes on, and clothes feel so painfully tight on it. Now when it’s cold and I’m wearing layers… Terrified of how that will feel when it’s been cut open and pulled apart for a FOURTH time! 😭 My jaw is still sore to the touch WEEKS after that first root canal for the third infection.

My teen girl, Eliora, might have juvenile arthritis like I had. (Waiting on blood results.) She’s been dealing with stiffness for a few years now and it’s been getting worse each winter. Last year, I started worrying. This year, she got worried when she couldn’t bend her fingers to hold her pen to do school. She isn’t in bad pain. Only feels it wish she bends her fingers or puts pressure on them like when opening a cupboard door. I seriously hope it’s not arthritis. The pain… The pain is horrendous. Mine stayed around after also getting progressively worse till I could not walk, hobbling in terrible foot and toe pain at school, friends telling me I “walk like a granny.” and it became adult arthritis. I don’t wish that for her. GP didn’t have any other possible diagnosis. Maybe when the tests are negative and we don’t need to see a rheumatologist, she will! (A mom can hope!)


Told you we need all the progress and laughter we can get.

Highs and lows of parenting while sick. I’ll take the highs a bit more cheerfully than the lows.😅

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